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Posted by Ben Grader on Wed Feb 23, 2005 11:42 pm
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Cold December sun
<br>golden light on bare branches
<br>does not warm my soul.
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Posted by proadventures on Thu Sep 28, 2006 10:50 am
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Nor mine Ben. I little sip out of the old fruit jar could change my perspective though.
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Posted by newpass on Tue Oct 10, 2006 10:54 am
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I like the direct juxtaposition between "Cold" and "Golden" - they share a sound but diverge in meaning. The image is also well portrayed, and you earn your right to use a somewhat cliched "warming of the soul" line by adding the preceding sensory details.
<br />
<br />Nice little haiku.
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Posted by Ben Grader on Tue Oct 10, 2006 7:28 pm
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Thanks for the comments.
<br />Tofu I suppose I could have put does not warm my heart but that would have been much the same. I had to keep the syllables down.
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Posted by Bluesy Socrateaser on Sun Mar 01, 2009 9:56 am
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Just fine Benny boy.
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